Letting Go of Old Habits
November 2008
What do you want in your life but are having a hard time realizing? It could be wanting a morning ritual that inspires you, exercising consistently, being on time, more ease and fun, quitting smoking/drinking, de-cluttering your home/office, eating healthier or getting more sleep.
We can get stuck in our ways, with attitudes, lifestyle habits and living environments that don't serve us and keep us from having what we want. What do you need to let go of which would free you to make inspired life changes?
Here are three places to look to help you let go of what's no longer serving you:
1. OUR ATTITUDE & BELIEFS
We tend to make assumptions and hold beliefs that aren't serving us, and often don't even realize it. Some examples include:
- I'm too old and set in my ways to change.
- I'll always be like this because it runs in the family.
- I'm too busy and don't have time.
- It's too hard to set boundaries and ask for what I want.
- Things will fall apart if I'm not in control.
- I'm always late.
- I don't know where to start.
- It's been hard with my parents/divorce/career setbacks etc., so life's not easy.
- I'm afraid to fail. I'm afraid of success.
Question The Stories You Tell Yourself - Are they really true? What else might be true? What else is possible?
Get Quiet - Meditate, journal, walk in nature, listen to soulful music that invites reflection. Notice what comes up when you quiet your mind. New ideas, hope, energy, possibility?
Future Self - Imagine your self twenty years from now. What advice would your future self give you around letting go of your limiting beliefs?
Build Your Inner Champion Exercise - Fold a piece of writing paper in half. On the left side write "Limitations" which are limiting thoughts, inner critic attacks, perceived obstacles, etc. On the right side write, "Abundance" which are the voices of your inner champion, spiritual guides, higher self, future self. Start with the left side and list your unpleasant traits, old stories, fears, worries, frustrations, cynicisms that are getting in the way. Then move to the right side and respond to each line on the left from your Higher Self/Inner Champion. Let it flow and see what he/she has to say. Discard the left side and keep the Champion truths on the right to inspire you every day. This idea came from one of my favorite coaches, Marian Baker, and her great book Wake Up Inspired!
2. LIFESTYLE HABITS
If you are consuming too much sugar, alcohol, coffee, eating too much or smoking and tolerating their side effects, consider how letting go of these might change your life in a good way.
First, question your stories you hang on to about your habits. Ask yourself why it's hard to quit/change. Your 'stories' will emerge. Then ask yourself, "Is that really true?" and "What else is true?" See if there are some other possible attitudes you could adopt.
Unmet Needs - For many, these unhealthy habits are a way of soothing a need of which we are unaware. When your next craving arises, ask yourself, "How am I feeling right now?" - "What is it I am needing right now?" Often, it's comfort, relaxation, soothing, love and peace. Then ask yourself "How else might I meet this need?" When we begin to acknowledge our feelings and take care of soothing ourselves in healthier ways, the poor habits are easier to change. Here's a great to adopt healthier eating habits by teaching you how to meet your needs other than with food: Eat By Choice Not By Habit.
Start small - Break your goal into small parts. Pick one thing to start changing. For example, no sweets after 8pm, eat a protein breakfast every day, reduce soda by a can per week. Design an achievable victory and build on your success.
Identify Soothing Activities - Plan something soothing to replace your old habit. A cup of tea, a bath, playing the guitar, reading a great novel, woodworking, listening to your favorite music.
Avoid All-or-Nothing Thinking - When you have a setback, recommit the very next day instead of giving up. Instead of labeling it a failure, honor yourself for the progress you've made and honor yourself by getting back on track. It's not about perfection but progress.
Be Grateful - Notice the changes you are making. Even if they are small, acknowledging them can create a more optimistic outlook and turn your inner critic into your inner champion. Cultivating positivity through appreciation and gratitude helps us accept what is good rather than focusing on what's not happening.
3. OUR STUFF
What is in your environment taking up space that no longer serves you? I recently let go of piles of clutter with my clutter busting friend, Brooks Palmer. He helped me recognize the emotional cost of too much clutter. I let go of clothes, furniture and other household items that were taking up space, no longer serving a purpose and creating stagnation in my environment. Wow, what a difference it made to let it go! The energy in each of these rooms opened up, felt lighter and the space offered new possibilities. An orderly house/office is like an invitation for a fresh start.
Try this: Pick one small area (the closet, an office drawer, a corner in the basement). Have a bag for garbage and a bag for donation. Go through your stuff and start letting go!
Attitudes - Is your mindset keeping you stuck with your stuff? Such as: "I might need it or use it" - "I paid a lot for that!" - "I don't want to just throw that away" Help yourself by asking: "Do I need this? Do I love it? Would I buy it now?" and "Can I let this go?"
If you are in Chicago, Los Angeles, San Francisco or NYC, contact Brooks, the Clutter Buster, for assistance in letting go of your clutter, or read his book, Clutter Busting: Letting Go of What's Holding You Back.
Food for thought:
- What would you like to let go of? Where could you start?
- With whom could you share your desire to let go and get encouragement and support along the way?
Contact Andrea for a complimentary 30-minute coaching call and take a "test drive." Experience how coaching can help you create structure for letting go, assist you in being more energized and accomplish your goals!
847-971-3643 / andrea@hgcoaching.com
